So Thankful...

Don't you just love it when God places something in your life that you had no idea you needed at all or even at that particular moment?! I know in the past few months I have just been so overwhelmed with this exact thing! Through the storms, the feelings, the transitions and the processing, God has been so faithful!! Providing me with friends, mentors AND an amazing new church family that I adore and can't get enough of!! Not only have they loved me, but God has loved me through them, when I have not loved myself. He has encouraged me through the words and actions of others... Showing me Christ in so many ways! Yes, people come into our lives and some will leave. People will let you down also. It's a part of life, we are all human! We all do it! Its different though when you show your heart, walls totally down and they still love you! They love the funny and the sad! They love unconditionally, just as God loves us unconditionally! 


My eyes and heart have been opened in so many ways, and most times, the only words I can seem to get out is a thank you! Really though, that thank you means so much more. It's hard to explain the gratitude that is pouring out of my heart right now. For those that have not only taken a little time to see inside my heart, but also those that have come up along side me and have constantly encouraged and loved on me. For that, I am beyond grateful and blessed! No words can truly express my feelings deep inside my heart. All I know is, no  matter what the future holds, those that have made such an impression on my heart will be in my heart and prayers always and forever! 


The good times over lunch! Endless chips n salsa! Our crazy addictions to Starbucks! Our weekly dinner conversations! Endless text messages and e-mails! Thursday Nights! Worshiping our King together!! Small group! Our girls nights out! Movie nights! Sex and the City! Our deep conversations and then bursting out into laughter!! Nights of girl talk! Growing and working on life together! Encouraging and lifting each other up in prayer! A place to rest your head! The tears and snot kind of cries! Girlfriends! Pure empathy! Not feeling we have to fix each other! Safe! Loved Unconditionally! Not Alone! Accepted! Patience! Joy! Laughter! Screaming! Home! 


I am truly grateful for those that God has placed into my life recently! I know that my life and heart has been forever changed because of each one of you! You have seen the dark parts of it. You have seen the joy in it. You have seen my heart in whatever state it was in, and chosen to be a part of it and not walked away. You have seen parts that I have hid for so long, even to myself and yet you have accepted me, and that part of my heart! I thank God every day for you and only pray that I am the same kind of friend you have all been to me! 


I love you all so much! You have been put into my life, and I thank God every day! You all have made a lasting imprint on my heart, and I will never be the same again! You have shown me love, pure unselfish love in so many ways and in my heart that love will always remain! Thank you will never be enough! Love you all!!!! 

Transition...

Transition is defined as- the process or period of changing 

from one state or condition to another. 

All I can say is that is exactly what I am going through right now. Its a word I have constantly been using the past few months, and just trying to figure out what the heck is going on in my life. So many people have asked me, what's going with your life? Let's not kid ourselves, how in the world are we suppose to answer that kind of question? So, my answer to most is... I'm going through a transition right now! All I know is it's been a tough one at times, but I have been seeing the fruit come of this crazy time of transition in my life right now. So many people are going through many of the same things I am, looking for work, a place to leave, hoping to fit in somewhere and to just get through this period. 

During this period of uncertainty in my life, I have been blessed by many people and encouraged to not give up on a dream... a dream which includes me making Orange County my permanent home. There have also been the people in my life that say it is time to give up on this dream and just come back to the desert and deal with the fact that I have failed. I have chosen to hold onto what has given my heart life when I am feeling like I have failed. 

"God gives us desires in our hearts for a reason. They become dreams or a passion that we can not let go of. Just because a door has not been opened or a few have closed, does not mean we have to give up on that dream. It means that we have to keep praying and working hard, and in God's amazing timing, our desires and dreams will be fulfilled! Just as He had planned."

So, this Monday I am continuing on with being in transition and heading back out to the desert. But, its not because I have given up yet on this dream that has been placed in my heart, but rather for a simple reason... I have been told I can not live out of my car until I find work in Orange County. Yes, I know... a crazy idea, but I was actually considering it. However, this does not mean I will not be out here still being a part of the way God is moving in Orange County and in my life! It's just simply part of the crazy transition. 

God is moving in big ways in my life out here in Orange County and I know that He has a big plan, it's just a matter of His timing, which is never to early and never late... its always... just Perfect! So much growth is happening to, and I am finally experiencing things I have never experienced before, and I know that is all God's doing! I will keep my eyes on Jesus and know that I am safe and that He has a plan for this big transition I have been in and that makes me so excited! 

Blessed Be Your Name

So, last week I went out and got an awesome amount of Jesus and Fellowship by attending 3 different church services! It was pretty awesome, not gonna lie! With the 3 services, I had an overflowing amount of  time in worship and it was powerful! The both arms in the air, singing at the top of my lungs, tears in my eyes and just wanting to jump, and then at times feeling as if My Jesus was right there with me, singing the same songs!!! What a feeling! Worship is so powerful for me and where I find Jesus so many times! One thing that I noticed and haven't been able to stop thinking about was the fact that at all 3 services, one of the same songs was played at each one..... Blessed be Your Name! 

Blessed Be Your Name

Blessed Be Your Name

In the land that is plentiful

Where Your streams of abundance flow

Blessed Be Your Name

Blessed Be Your Name

When I'm found in the desert place

Though I walk through the wilderness

Blessed Be Your Name

Every blessing You pour out

I'll turn back to praise

When the darkness closes in, Lord

Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name

When the sun's shining down on me

When the world's all as it should be

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name

On the road marked with suffering

Though there's pain in the offering

Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out

I'll turn back to praise

When the darkness closes in, Lord

Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

You give and take away

You give and take away

My heart will choose to say

Lord, Blessed be Your name

God, 

You give and take away

You give and take away

My heart will choose to say

Lord, Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

I have heard this song played so many times in worship sets, and love it each time! Such a powerful worship song in so many ways, but as I was standing with my hands raised to the sky, my heart pouring out to these words, I just stopped. How many times have I really stopped to Praise Him in my suffering? How many times am I having a horrible emotional day because of my past and thank Him for giving me this? I would love to say I praise Him all the time, even in my suffering. I think we all would like to say that. But, many times, we can't say that until we see the good come from it. While I am going through the darkness, walking through the valley, I cry out to Him to help and to hold me, but I don't stop and praise Him for my suffering. 

Are we not called to praise Him in all situations and all our sufferings?  Are we not called to have faith and know that He is a God of goodness and not pain? Is Jesus not our Heavenly Father who has known us before we were even thought of by earthly beings? Does He not see all we do and know all we are going to do or go through? Then why is it so hard for us to stop and praise Him for our suffering, knowing He has overcome the world and will make whatever we are going through good and for His glory?! 

For me personally, I not only will look at this song with different eyes now, but also will stand up in the pain and suffering, and praise Him, because I know He will see us through! After all... He is our biggest fan and always cheering for us to succeed in all we do! Right?! 

Giving it a Shot!

So, I created a blog profile almost two years ago and yet never actually posted a blog?!?! Yes, Crazy I know! I have never been a fan of writing much. Never have stuck to journaling, writing letters regularly, or anything really of the sort. Or at least I thought. I love talking with people and writing emails or messages to friends and family, and often they get to be pretty lengthy! So clearly, I have a lot of thoughts inside and will occasionally have a case of word vomit! Lucky you! Since I started following some of my family and friends blogs, I have loved the whole idea of blogging, but would always talk myself out of it cause I didn't know what the blog should be about, or if I had anything to even blog about really. Well, I think that whole mindset has changed, or at least it is starting to!

After talking about writing and blogging with some family and friends, who all blog or have in the past, and with some encouragement from them I have decided to give it a try. I was reminded that I once use to write poems and songs, notes and letters, and just enjoyed it and they were good?! Plus, blogging is not just for those people that might come across your blog and read it, it's more about the blogger and what they want to share... RIGHT?!?!

What should I write about???? Well, I have decided that I can't just write about one thing, so this will be a totally random blog, pretty much whatever is on my mind or heart, and that makes me happy! Some might be long, some might be short. Some I hope will challenge us to think, and others will just be fun! This blog, will be just me.... and my heart!

That's All! Hope you come back and visit soon... and hopefully there will be more posts on my side! HA!